Tuesday, March 27, 2007

home, home again...

That's right, people, I'm back in the great Garden State. I had a great time visiting Real. Or I should say we had a great time. Or maybe I should say a good time was had by all. I know some of you out there want to hear lots of juicy details or something, so here's a juicy detail... tangerine and pomegranate!

We went to a nut store and took pictures (see picture at right). I had never been to a store solely dedicated to the sale of nuts, but apparently that is what you do.

We also went to the zoo where we saw many things, including some tortoises who were making some sweet tortoise love. It was a sight to behold, but we were trying not to be too obvious about laughing at the tortoises because there were little kids going by with their parents, and the kids were saying things like "Look, Mommy, that turtle is climbing on the other turtle!" Uh, yes, Real and I giggle at tortoise pr0n. We are very mature.

I am happy to report that Chattanooga now has another Starbucks, bringing the count to four (4). I think this new one is my favorite. Very comfy and modern decor (including a lovely outdoor patio), lots of AC outlets for the laptop crowd, and a fancypants label printing system to ensure they get your drink right. And if you want, you can purchase the tangerine and pomegranate there and have your own juicy details. If you're into that sort of thing, I mean.

Traveling back home was teh suck, and Delta Airlines is very nearly Dead To Me, and the TSA peeps are On Watch. I am so sick and tired of them attempting a full body cavity search on me just because I have (gasp!) an asthma inhaler! Doesn't it look menacing in this picture? Everybody panic!!!

I tried explaining that the inhalers are not even liquid anymore, they're powder, and they still had to take my whole purse apart and check everything. A TSA woman with some really unfortunate makeup choices told me that perhaps I should consider packing it in my checked luggage. Because that's a handy place for it to be in case I need it while in flight or while making my connection or if the bag gets lost. I was going to tell her that perhaps she should consider stowing her eyeliner in her checked luggage but I figured it's best not to be snarky with the TSA, no matter how much they fucking deserve it. But seriously, what gives? How could I hijack a plane with my Proventil? "Everyone on this plane shall have clear breathing passages! Death to America! And death to wheezing!"

So now I'm back at work, and you know, vacation days are like a million times better than work days. I miss my Real. We've already started planning our next visit and that helped me not be all teary at the aiport. Incidentally, this next visit will be ONE YEAR after our first visit. Which to me is amazing.

As I'm sure it is to you, too.


REAL said...

That guy looks like a nut!

Laura Belle said...

Glad a good time was had by all. :)

BobbiBobbi said...

That is my line.

I am just saying.

I look forward to eating you soon.

Dino aka Katy said...

Nut store???? Tortoise porn??? Mhh very interesting visit I can see

Lesley said...

real - well, if I remember correctly, he wasn't the only one who got his picture taken while there...

belle - awwww... thanks!

bobbibobbi - bad snake! go away!

katy - yes, it was!

MoSup said...

Hey, you could be like the flying imams and start demanding some special rights for the asthmatics!

Norman said...

**sigh** Well - of course we all know that Bin Laden is planning his next attack using inhalers. HOW DID YOU NOT KNOW THAT? My intel sources tell me that they are replacing the Proventil with Pepper Spray. They're veerree verreeee sneaky these terrorists are. However, it is known that the pepper inhalers will not work in the great state of Texas because we'd just consider it a condiment and ask for it with every in-flight meal. Oh wait. They don't serve in-flight meals anymore ... do they. Well - then we'd use it as the snack.

So you see --- TSA is actually ON THE BALL.

just sayin'


Ace said...

When I was at the Hawaii zoo, me and a bunch of little kids were in the lizard house, and two lizards started doing it. And the one little kid goes, "Mommy, is that lizard eating the other one," and suddenly all the parents are like, "Oh, look over here at the frogs!"

I was dying laughing.

Glad you had fun!

Lisa said...

Lesley, you seriously crack me up!! LOL I won't even tell you what the inhaler looks like to me, but menacing isn't the word I'd use.

Lesley said...

mosup - Good idea! There should be first class for the price of coach for asthmatics! I'm sure the air quality is better up there. ;)

norman - Your idea of Tabasco inhalers cracked me up! I'm surprised those haven't hit Texas yet.

ace - Thanks! Lizards, hmmm? Now that would be interesting, what with their tails and all.

lisa - LOL! Aww, thanks!

Stewie said...

Does Real always put his face in the nuts?

REAL said...

Not always stewie, sometimes I let you do it.

Lesley said...

stewie - WHAT? Never!

A peanut is not a NUT, it's a LEGUME! Everyone knows that! God!

(imagine that said ala Napoleon Dynamite)

Ranting said...

I am so glad that we got to see you. I count D and I as very fortunate that we actually get to lay eyes on the two of you when you are in town.

I'm sorry to hear that the TSA has apparently decided to discriminate against those who suffer from the asthma. Perhaps you could have also suggested she remove her ass from her shoulders...ya' know since in ur imagination you kicked it there!Hehe!