Monday, February 14, 2011

this year's love

Yeah, I've been listening to some David Gray today. Tis the season and all that.

For the record, I am not at all bitter about being single today. Any bitterness I could possibly possess is currently being directed to being bitter about being unemployed.  Said bitterness may have had a surge today. Why? Oh I'll get to that.  How about a list?!!

1. I started off the day by getting yelled at by an unemployment employee. I shit you the fuck not. Last week I was double-booked for the same orientation for the same program, and I called and called, left several messages and heard nothing back. And, as I indicated in my messages, I had a job interview at that time and so if I really did need to report to their office, I had to reschedule. By some logic that I suppose only a state worker could understand, this made me noncompliant. Thus the yelling. I am filing a complaint.  No one has the right to yell at me, and this is not how civilized people conduct themselves.  The good news is that I am getting my checks, and nothing is disrupting that. I suppose since I'm collecting the maximum amount they want to keep tabs on me but I can live without their treating me like shit.

2. Understandably, this put me into a very bad frame of mind. Very very bad. Frustration, crying, wanting to kick things, and more crying. Even after a few weeks I'm still as bewildered by this whole thing as I was the day they told me. I didn't deserve to be let go. And I sure as hell don't deserve to be yelled at by the very same state workers who are supposed to be, oh I don't know, HELPING me perhaps at this time. 

3. Needless to say, I'd like to state for the record that this has been the single most soul-crushing experience of my life. Certainly, there are worse things I have lived though, but this is the most soul-crushing.

4. After the morning's unpleasantness, my day improved significantly. I decided that what I needed was to get the hell out of the house, so I went to the gym for some strength training, then to Trader Joe's, then BJ's. At BJ's I bought a wedge of Jarlsberg cheese approximately the same size as my Irish head. This made me quite happy.

5. The day improved even more, as I went and met my friend K for Chipotle for dinner, followed by going to see "Sixteen Candles" at a nearby theater. I had forgotten how funny that movie is. It was a fabulous girls' night out for V Day.


And now I am back home, watching some TV and relaxing.  However, I had better get some rest now as tomorrow begins my career transition seminar workshop. Wish me luck with that, would ya? Good night.

1 comment:

Snooze said...

I had to do compulsory resume writing and career counselling workshops in my last bout of unemployment. I went through the whole 'why am I here?' bit as well, but I did find some useful nuggets of info in each. I hope you do too.