last friday

Last Friday of the year, that is. And guess what? Minimum Blog Requirement.

Although I will say this: I love blogging. I write this for me. And blogging has often been my cheap therapy, my way to work things out for myself, and even a way to connect with other people.

However, there are people out there who take things out of context, act offended at something they think I said while reading between the lines (um no, I'm not talking about anyone else other than MYSELF), and cause me drama. I do not like this. I've actually thought about discontinuing blogging because of it, but then I went back to my original point: I WRITE THIS FOR ME.

That's all. Good night.

an affair to remember

I hope I didn't make you think with that subject line that I'd be discussing any actual affairs. Rather, that's the movie that LesleyMom and I watched this afternoon -- well, part of it at least. Of course, we watched the big ending and both yelled "Don't go, Cary Grant!" when we thought he was going to leave without realizing that Deborah Kerr really didn't stand him up that day on the Empire State Building and that they still loved each other. Awwww...

Today was mostly decent. I'd say it was about 85% awesome and 15% extremely annoying but that didn't take away from the awesome. I have a phone interview tomorrow morning for what would be a very good job in a place I'd love to work, and it has an easy commute (bonus!). I also have a meeting with a headhunter on Tuesday morning about other opportunities that could come my way. All of a sudden, I'm a hot commodity. This can only lead to good things, people.

On the extremely annoying side of things, the tire that went flat the other night had to be replaced, and things like that cost money. I also had to deal with some annoying drama llamas, and you know I am not a fan of such things. Also, last week I'd had a very very good interview, had very good feedback, was told they'd call the next day with an offer, and now they've disappeared. I don't get it. It's like when you go on a really great first date, the guy says he'll call, and then he seemingly falls off the face of the earth. I know that the time seems a lot longer to me as a prospective employee, and that most likely neither the company nor the recruiter is doing any work at all this week, but hey, at least let me know what's going on. Otherwise, that's just rude. And annoying.

That's all. I need to rest up for tomorrow morning's interview. Good night, my lovelies.

fourth day of christmas

This is going to be something close to a Minimum Blog Requirement today. Yesterday's blog said a lot, you know. Plus, last night I could not, for the life of me, turn off my brain and go the fuck to sleep and today I'm exhausted. I fell asleep sometime around 5:15 am (yes, I shit you not) and then got my tuchus out of bed by 8:45 am. I wanted to sleep more, of course, but I also didn't want to stay in bed all day and completely throw off my schedule. That's never good. So tonight I'm writing this at around 10:00 pm. When I'm done I'm going to take a hot bath (since I'm allowed to take them again once more!), put my laundry in the dryer, take a sleep aid and then (hopefully!) SLEEP. I might go a little crazy if I don't.

And that's all I have to say right now. Peace out, girl scouts.

the feeling that it's all a lot of oysters but no pearls

So as the year is ending, I've been doing the usual year-end review that I like to do. Those of you who have been following my blog for a while probably know that 2011 has been no fucking picnic for me. It's been a year with a lot of losses, that's for sure, but I can't help but think that it's all leading to something greater and better which will make me happier than I could have imagined. This deep-down knowledge that regardless of any present crappy circumstances I *will* come out on top has gotten me through some very dark moments.

And I do have my dark moments. One thing I've realized is that I have a very hard time moving on when things feel unresolved to me. Unresolved as in I haven't had my say and ending things wasn't my idea to begin with. It makes me crazy and leaves me grasping for just something familiar and worse, feeling stuck and unable to move on. This is true in several avenues but the easiest one to talk about here is my job. Eliminating my department and my job certainly wasn't my idea, nor was the resulting almost year of unemployment, thankyouverymuch. And when it first happened I found myself contacting former coworkers to ask how specific projects (MY projects!) were going, just wanting to hear about how the work I had started was progressing, hear familiar voices, feel like I was still part of something. I even hoped that they'd realize they missed me and needed me and then ask me to come back. It took some time (but thankfully, not much time) to realize that outside of work none of those people really cared about me and there was no reason to even try to stay in touch. "We'll meet for lunch/drinks, I'll give you a call" is meaningless from many people. I do have a few friendships that I'll continue to hold onto (i.e., if you're cool enough to read this blog and/or be my Facebook friend) but the people that I last worked with? Yeah, not them. I realize now I also spent way too much time feeling stuck and unable to move on. Because everything felt unresolved, I tried to resolve it in my head, and most of the reasons I came up with were that I was clearly a Very Bad Person who does not deserve Good Things.

Yeah, like I said, there are other avenues in my life in which this has been an issue, but this is the only one I'm comfortable blogging about.

So I feel like I've spent 2011 gradually working toward letting go, and realizing that there are just some things that are never going to feel resolved to my satisfaction. And that's okay. I've also been realizing that some things just suck because they suck, and it doesn't necessarily mean that I'm a bad person. And certainly not a Very Bad Person.

But it's a lot to think about. It makes me want to ring in the New Year all alone and start 2012 feeling well-rested and independent. We shall see.

More blogging tomorrow. I have a fabulous 2012 to plan so I'd better get to planning it.

no fire where i lit my spark

I'm home and I'm tired. My seroma is hurting -- oh and for the love of God and All Things Holy if one more person sings "My seroma" to the tune of "My Sharonna" I will cut them. Keep it to yourself, unless you want to hear very, VERY detailed descriptions of said seroma. That can be arranged. Or, of course, if you wanna get cut. That also can be arranged.

In other news, I am enjoying the hell out of the after-Christmas sales! I got some snazzy gift cards for Christmas and taking advantage of coupons and other special offers. I'm still a little overwhelmed by all the clothing options I now have but then I try stuff on and see how gorgeous I look and it makes the whole buying process much easier. I never thought I'd enjoy shopping, but here I am!

That's enough for now. Peace out, girl scouts.

merry christmas

That's all. Regular blogging will resume tomorrow.

christmas eve

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

xoxo

christmas adam

Tomorrow is Christmas Eve, so today was Christmas Adam!

And guess what? Christmas Adam gets an MBR. I'm getting home much, much later than this time stamp would suggest and right now I just need to hit the proverbial hay. But I had a very fun evening out, as you already know if we are Facebook friends. Wooooooo!!!

Good night!

couldn't miss this one this year...

Today was a busy, BUSY day and tomorrow will be rather busy as I have to go get a crack in my windshield repaired (at least I hope it can be repaired, rather than replaced), pick up the last of my Xmas gift shopping, and some other errands I'm forgetting. Oh and apparently I need to enhance the color of my hair.

I didn't hear about the job yet today. I'm not anxious though; I'm actually feeling quite Zen about it. I'm thinking that the recruiter told me that the employer was making a decision today because he's more motivated to get me in there ASAP since that would earn him a commission and that's how he makes a living. But I'm not worried. It's all good in the end, and if it's not good, then it's not the end!

In other news, I am having hella abdominal pain tonight, and it is no fun. Earlier tonight when I was out, something made me wheeze and the subsequent coughing made me feel like my incision was going to open and all my guts were going to spill out -- kind of like that part in The Little Mermaid when Ursula had become the girl but then she turned back into Ursula again. I also sneezed a few times and it gave me a similar feeling, so now? PAIN. I need to take a painkiller and get some sleep.

More tomorrow!

good

I had a job interview today which went very well. The feedback from the interview was very positive, and I should probably know one way or the other by close of business tomorrow. I would love this new job, however, even if they decide to go with another candidate, just the fact that I had a good interview and felt so confident going in there and telling them about myself has given me a big and much-needed boost. I definitely feel much more confident interviewing now than I did before, and today I felt like I was there to tell them how fabulous I am and if they can't see that and offer me a cushy, high-paying job ASAP, well that's just too bad for them!

In other news, apparently six months ago I was feeling a little crazy and I scheduled myself a dental appointment for 8:30 tomorrow morning. So now I must sleep so I can wake up for said appointment. After that I really, REALLY need to go finish my Christmas shopping!

Good night.

tuesday two

Two. That's all you get.

1. I have an in-person interview tomorrow for a job I'm very interested in, so PLEASE, send me some good thoughts around 1:00 pm Eastern. I'm still coming to terms with the fact that at least for now I won't have a wee little 15 minute commute like I had when I worked for Those Fuckers, but this job could lead to some great things for me, and I'm willing to bite the bullet, fill up my Beetle, and commute. Maybe I'll use the time to do things like listen to audiobooks or learn Spanish.

2. I had another good follow-up appointment with my surgeon. He told me again that I should feel good about how well I've healed and that obviously I've taken very good care of myself. He said he wanted to tell me that because he knows that dealing with the seroma and the hospitalization I had is a pain in the ass, but considering what else I could have dealt with, I'm still doing better than expected. That made me feel good to hear! He also said that next week I can go back to the gym to do the treadmill and that in three more weeks I should be ready to go back to Zumba. THREE WEEKS. YES!!!


That's two. Good night.

well maybe just a half a drink more...

Two more Christmas gifts were purchased tonight. I have six more to go, three of which will come from the same store. I can do this. Since I was such a good girl about buying Christmas gifts, I also swung by Sephora to pick up my birthday gift from them (a big bottle of Happy Birthday, Beautiful! shower gel) and a few other items. Fun new things from Sephora always make me feel gorgeous.

I don't want to say too much but after today I have a feeling that my Year of Lesley sabbatical will soon be drawing to a close. It would be nice to once again have one of those job thingies so I can, ya know, buy stuff, but at the same time Year of Lesley has rocked! I may need to recite a Requiem Mass for the Year of Lesley when it finally does end. "Rest eternal grant to the Year of Lesley, and may light perpetual shine upon it!"

I'll admit it, I posted a rant on Facebook today that I had posted here two weeks ago. The one about how there's nothing tackier than asking someone who just went through reconstructive surgery how much weight their surgeon removed and what size they wear now.  As you can imagine, I was asked that question one time too many (at least) and decided to put it out there where the offenders would see it. Let them feel like shit instead of me! However, I will say that those of you who have been supportive and cheered for me along the way and not asked nosy questions? YOU ROCK. Thank you for being there for me. I never, ever expected that anyone would support me in this, so your support and encouragement is a welcome and unexpected surprise, and one that I'm truly thankful for! Oh I should probably post progress photos soon. I'll add that to this week's To Do List, okay?

And in other news, I need a warm compress, a pain pill, and a comfort movie so I must be going. Good night!

no nap = no will to blog

Busy day, today. I had a few things I needed to work on around the house and also an Excel file I was trying to tame for a friend (epic fail, that. Wah!) and I didn't get around to taking my daily nap and now tonight I'm feeling it. I cannot overemphasize the fact that I've never, ever been a nap person and the fact that I currently need one doesn't sit too well with me. I get tired very easily, though. Tomorrow I'll be five weeks out of surgery (yay!) so I figure this nap-needing can go on another three weeks before I start to worry.

Also, it occurs to me that I should probably get my iron levels checked. My numbers were a little low when I was in the hospital last week, and if they're trending downward I'd like to get ahead of that rather than having to go for iron infusions. As much fun as they were, I'd rather not repeat the experience!

And now, I'm going to be a big trendsetter and go plank in my bed for the next seven or so hours. Night!

have yourself a merry little xmas...

I think I can think of four things to tell you. Let's see what happens.

1. Every year there are more and more Christmas songs that make me feel nostalgic and teary. Good Lord, I am becoming a sap in my old age. And it's not even just sad songs that do this to me. Today I got teary when I heard the Boston Pops doing "Sleigh Ride" because it made me think of being in my high school orchestra and playing that song. LesleyMom will tell you that we sounded even better than the Boston Pops. True story.

2. I'll just say this very briefly but being in the middle of all this surgery recovery has been a welcome distraction from some of the melancholy I feel at this time of year. Sometimes Christmastime can feel like one huge reminder that one is a 30-something cat-owning spinster. But not this year. This year I'm a 30-something who's taking care of her incision and seroma and in awe of her stunning new physique.

3. I am feeling very confident about getting back into the workforce very soon. As much as I've enjoyed the Year of Lesley, all good things must end. And hey, I've done some pretty kickass things this year! I won't list them all now. That's for another day. Besides, this is already a list and a list within a list? Not sure I approve.

4. I'm quite aware that I'm still not ready to go back to Zumba, but I miss my Zumba pals something fierce. I'm actually thinking of swinging by the gym tomorrow when my usual Sunday class gets out so I can say hello. I miss getting my hour (or two) or cardio every day much more than I had expected. I'm really, really hoping that my incision will close itself up in the next week so that I can at least walk on the treadmill or the elliptical. Or that I learn to be patient with this process. Hmmm...


That's four. Sister needs some sleep, so good night!

another auld lang syne

This is a Minimum Blog Requirement for the day. I am very tired and I desperately need a pain killer. I might be a little concerned for my needing of a pain killer, but let's revisit that next week, ok?

The one thing I will tell you is that today, FINALLY, I heard on the radio the finest holiday song that's ever been recorded: "Same Old Lang Syne" by Dan Fogelberg. It's a tradition that my cousin, my aunt and I have, we all text each other the first time we hear it because it's our song. Normally, I've heard it on the radio by now but obviously I haven't been spending much time driving and listening to the radio.

Anyway, here it is. If you don't like this song, then clearly you hate awesome!

it's christmas time in the city...

Oh hey, how are ya? I'm chilling at home with a big mug of tea and a percoset, which is just what I needed. I'd gone the whole day without a painkiller and it was way overdue.

Today I was able to sleep late once again, and then I met LesleyMom for lunch and just a little shopping, and after that I needed a nap. I'm so not a nap person, but I get tired very easily right now. The good part is that I have the most difficult person to shop for crossed off my list (it may or may not have been the person with whom I lunched today...) and I got myself a new fancy water bottle. It's a snazzy Camelbak one that will fit in my car's cup holder. I'm easy to please.

And now I'm going to finish my tea, have some cheese, and watch the rest of Conan before bed. Good night!

ching-a ching ching

That's a line from quite possibly one of the best Christmas songs ever recorded, Dominick the Donkey. I finally heard that song tonight. The Christmas season can now begin!

I feel like making a list. How about five (5) things I can think of to tell you tonight? Great!

1. This morning I slept until 10:30 am. No, really, I did. I can't even remember the last time I did that, but I guess I needed the rest. And today I felt great! I started running out of steam around 9:00 pm, but I had just jellied 120 Linzer Tarts and that can really wear a person out, you know. Now that I'm back at my own home it's a lot easier to sleep in and take naps, so I think over the next week or so I'll just let myself rest as I need to. This is my time to finish getting better.

2. My healing continues, btw. My incision is looking pretty good. Even the seroma site looks not-too-bad, certainly a lot less angry than it looked before my stint in the hospital, but the good doctor was concerned that the seroma could weaken another spot in my incision and bust through it for drainage, so he told me my one task this week is protecting my incision. My lifting restrictions were cut back -- officially, it's nothing more than 10 lbs, but really he said closer to 5 lbs would be better -- and I'm also being more conscious about how I stand. Standing up too straight can be bad for the incision.

3. Today I managed to go to Trader Joe's, as I'd planned to, and picked up a few things so that I won't have to do any cooking, along with twenty cans of Tuna For Cats. I really haven't felt like eating, which leads to not feeling like cooking. I've been making sure I have enough protein shakes so that I can meet my daily protein goal, taking all my vitamins and supplements, and of course drinking plenty of water. As long as I'm feeling pretty good, I think that's enough.

4. Tonight I went to a friend's house to bake sugar-free Christmas cookies, thus why I was tarting up some Linzers. I got a kickass recipe for potato chip cookies, and I think I will be making these in the future. It sounds strange but crushed potato chips plus crushed pecans makes for a very good cookie.

5. I haven't done any Christmas shopping. None. Nothing. Nada. I should probably do something about this tomorrow. I have a very understanding family, which is why I'm not panicking right now, but still, this is a new record, even for my procrastinating ass. Although, I've been just a little preoccupied with other things of late...


That's five. Sleepy time!

drained

I went today and got drained. I'm sorry if you're squeamish but that's what I did. Thank God that LesleyMom was nice enough to drive me to my appointment, because there was a big needle and I needed painkillers.

All the antibiotics I've been given have taken a toll on me, if you know what I mean. I had to get another prescription just for that, which caused quite a stir at the stupidass 24 hour pharmacy because this new med could be bad if one takes acetaminophen-containing painkillers. Right now, I'm not too worried about my liver, honestly. Just give me my meds!

After my appointment (but before the stupidass pharmacy), LesleyMom and I went to Starbucks, and then back to Casa de LesleyParents so I could sleep off my pain meds and have dinner with the LesleyParents. LesleyMom made some kickass bolognese, btw. I may sneak over to their house tomorrow and steal some of the leftovers, since it's usually even better the next day. I'm happy to say that when it was finally time that I could leave, I succeeded in getting Clementine into the cat carrier and back home! I got her to follow me into the laundry room and once we were in there, I closed the door, pulled the carrier out of the closet, and got her to go in. And she actually quieted down once we were in the car and went to sleep. I think maybe the secret is to use the carrier at night when it's dark. What is it about the cat carrier that turns cats into little feline Mr. T's? I kept imagining her saying "Hannibal, I ain't gettin' in no cat carrier!" Actually, Clementine would make an excellent feline Mr. T. I'm sure she pities fools. As do I.

Today's big project was driving myself to the grocery store for a few essentials. Tomorrow's project will be going to Trader Joe's. Today's trip wasn't too bad -- I felt a little sheepish about asking for help, but the Shoprite people were actually pretty cool about it. I can't lift anything over 10 lbs right now, and I hadn't planned on buying anything heavy, but then once I got to the store I saw that I would get a free case of water for buying two Mio drink mixes, which I needed anyway. I had to get someone to put the water into my cart, then onto the belt (the cashier insisted on scanning it), then back to the cart, then into my trunk (where it will remain). Asking for help like this is no small thing for Miss Independent here.

Time for painkillers and sleep. Peace out, girl scouts.

home, home again, i like to be here when i can...

Tonight I'm back at Chez Lesleygirl for the first time in four weeks. Well, actually, Luna and I are home. Clementine decided she had better things to do than get in her cat carrier, like hide under the sideboard and china closet, so she's still at Casa de LesleyParents. And this is why she's the Gingah Ninja! I originally thought I'd only need to stay with the 'rents for two weeks, but mine was no ordinary panniculectomy + abodominoplasty. Apparently, getting a blob the size of a kindergartener removed from one's abdomen and then being sewn into a corset of muscle requires some time to recover. Who knew? Also I needed to sleep in a big chair + ottoman for longer than I expected, and we are big chair deficient in my house.

It's weird the things I've noticed now that I'm back at my own house. Like, why is my TV so small? Why don't I have 100 movie channels to watch? Why isn't there a nice Guatemalan lady who comes to clean once a week? I'm not so much concerned about those first two, but believe me, when I go back to work, I am hiring a housekeeper. Housework makes me miserable and cuts into my me-time, and once I'm gainfully employed I will gladly pay someone else to do it!

And now I must sleep. I put away most of the stuff I brought home -- there are still a few things at my parents' house since I can't lift too much -- and after a brief panic when I couldn't find my pain meds, I've settled in quite nicely. Tomorrow afternoon I have another follow up appointment with my surgeon. LesleyMom is going to drive me to it since there's a distinct possibility that it'll involve a big needle (boo!) and narcotics for me (party!) and that'll mean I can't drive myself home. So I may get one last hurrah with the big TV, 100 movie channels and big chair + ottoman after all! We shall see.

Good night.

home again!

I'm back home!

Well, not my home yet, but my parents' home is almost home for me, especially since my cats are here with me. I couldn't drive home because of all the painkillers so my plan tomorrow is to wake up and drive my stuff, my beasties, and myself home in the morning. This all depends on how my pain level is. The pain level has not been good, let's just say. I have more antibiotics and painkillers to take at home, along with hot compresses.

I was doing my best to stay positive but I'm quite relieved to be out of the hospital. It's very difficult to get A good night's sleep there, and there were far too many people asking me questions about my bowel movements. I had asked the doctor to order Miralax for me on an as-needed basis, however, I had opted not to take it at 6:00 AM and then realized around 6:00 PM that I needed it after all. This caused quite a conundrum and I had to wait two hours while the house doctor and pharmacy were both consulted. Really? All this for an over-the-counter drug? From the same people who were so über-concerned about my ability to go Number Twosers? So yeah, that whole lack of control thing one experiences while in the hospital? I am most definitely nt a fan! Shocking, I know.

I have to give a big shout out to my friend K who was there when the doctor said I could go home, and volunteered to drive me home. I still had my mad meatball craving, and as luck would have it our friend M had made a giant batch of meatballs and invited us over, so I have to give M a shout out too. I am very lucky to have friends who are willing to help me, whether it's by driving my ass around, giving me some comfort food, or even just sending me supportive emails, texts, Facebook posts, and phone calls. It means a lot to me to know people care!

Tomorrow marks four weeks since my surgery. Despite recent events, I still maintain that my recovery is going well. I feel like I'm at about the halfway point. That's right, whoa, I'm halfway there, whoa oh, living' on a prayer!

Good night, loves.

day two

Yes, I'm still in the hospital, and will most likely remain here another day or two. Jealous? You should be!

Being in the hospital is beyond boring, but today I realized I'm a lucky girl because I had 11 visitors! That's right, 11 people love me enough to come over and try to cheer me up. My friends and family have been excellent about bringing me whatever I need, which is great. When I complained that there was no half & half here so I couldn't drink my coffee, my friend M brought me a big mug of coffee with cream, brewed by her hubs who is Mr. Coffee himself. Seriously, it was a fine cuppa joe and I'm not just saying that because she'll see this! M and another friend K also brought me protein shakes which I'm quite thankful for, as I'm sipping one now. I very much need to supplement my protein now and the hospital's idea of accommodating this was to bring me that Ensure crap. Yeah, and it was Ensure for, wait for it, WEIGHT GAIN! Seriously?!! I'm also a little frustrated with how they're accommodating my meal requests. They seem to not know anything about how one ought to eat post-gastric bypass and/or when one has insulin resistance. I need to get a few things straightened out tomorrow. No one knows more about how I need to eat than I do, thank you very much!

Also, right now I would do some very bad things for some meatballs. And a shower! But not at the same time. That would be weird. I also miss my cats. They've really been such a comfort during my recovery, and I miss waking up from my naps with them snuggled up to me and the way they've been keeping their little kitty vigil to make sure I'm okay.

I really, really appreciate all the well wishes people have sent. I'm doing my best to stay positive during this time, and every little bit of encouragement helps. I'm also not calling it a setback. I prefer what my surgeon said when he told me it's an issue that can happen, and when it does we deal with it. The hospital certainly isn't my favorite place to be, but I know that this is absolutely where I need to be right now. An infection like this is no joke, but I'm not going to think about that either!

Good night. Please keep those good thoughts and prayers coming!

well all righty then

This post is coming to you LIVE and in technicolor from my hospital bed. Yes, I've been admitted with a post-op infection and seroma.

Last night I went to see my surgeon because the drainage was getting heavier and increasingly putrid. He did a culture and suggested one of the options was to go into the hospital for IV antibiotics. Of course, my first reaction was GOOD GOD, NO HOSPITAL but I agreed to think about it. He asked if I had a fever and I sheepishly said I didn't know because the thermometer had accidentally gone through the washer and dryer and wasn't working.

So last night I went home from that appointment (after stopping to buy more gauze and bandages and a thermometer) and decided to do a little experiment. I avoided all fever reducers (Tylenol, ibuprofen, and Percocet) for a few hours to see if I spiked a fever.

After three hours, I was 102.8. After four hours, I was 104 and had terrible chills, seeing spots feeling lightheaded. I took a dose of painkillers plus Tylenol and left a voicemail at the surgeon's office saying that I thought the hospital was a good idea.

My surgeon's office got things rolling first thing this morning and I've been unbelievably impressed with how well they've taken care of me. I had originally hoped to go back to the surgery center where I had my bypass and reconstructive surgery, but the surgery team felt strongly that I needed to go to the actual hospital in case I needed extra services the surgery center doesn't have, and also I wouldn't need an insurance precertification, which could take a day or two, if I went through the hospital's ER. So off I went, and I was greeted at the door of the ER by one of my surgeon's residents, who got me through the ER in record time and up to a room. That was good because the ER is full of sick people. Gross.

So now here I am, powered by IV antibiotics and morphine. Not sure how many days I'll be here but it shouldn't be too long. Send good, healing thoughts & prayers my way, please.

Peace out, girl scouts!

meh

I'm sick, people. Fever, chills, a bad infection, and that sort of thing. This is not good.

Send some positive thoughts and prayers, please. I'll keep you posted.

midweek mbr

Yes, a rare Wednesday Minimum Blog Requirement. I'm having some pain tonight but I can't even complain about it. Overall I am grateful for how well I am healing, and that outweighs any complaints I could possibly have by quite a bit!

Good night.

typical tuesday

Well, typical for life of late, at least.

Like last Tuesday and the Tuesday before, I went to see my surgeon for a follow-up appointment. And like both of those Tuesday's I'm now in pain from said appointment. This week I had to get some staples removed, and for added fun I was having an issue called a seroma and fixing that involved a very big needle. Very, very big. And also a couple other issues but I won't get into them. They're kinda gross. I've used the word "putrid" more in the last week than in my entire life up to this point. Nice, right? Oh and the staple removal wasn't as horrible as I'd feared. I turned my head away and did my yoga breathing while imagining I was in my happy place (tropical beach, in a chaise lounge under a palapa, looking out at the warm blue water while cute waiters with nice butts bring drinks), and I was able to disassociate myself from the pain.

I was a little upset, I'll admit, about the issues I was having. I thought this was a setback in my recovery and that I wasn't healing well, but Dr. S assured me that they weren't really complications per se, but more like issues that can happen along the way, and if they happen, we deal with them. He said that overall I'm healing well and I should feel good about the progress I've made so far. That was nice to hear because it means that as much as I've hated staying home and resting, it's doing me a world of good.

So now I'm back to resting, recovering, and trying to prevent any future issues. Yes, I have pain tonight but I know it's part of the process and will soon pass.

Time for a pain pill. Goodnight.

ugh

Can I get a birthday do-over? I have never had so many people try to ruin my day, make me feel bad when I defended myself, and then play the victim. Seriously? How about you just wish me a happy birthday and not shit on my parade? Oh and for added fun, remember I am only three weeks out of major and painful surgery and dealing with some healing/recovery issues, as well as ongoing exhaustion.

It was not a happy day. Next year I may just stay home and stay away from other people, the phone, the iPhone, the iPad, and laptop. Or I may run off to a fabulous all-inclusive for the week.

I'm definitely not putting up with this shit again. I can assure you of that.

happy lesleymas eve!

Oh it's been quite a weekend, people, and I'm more than a little tired tonight. I think it's safe to say that Lesleymas will involve a lot of resting, although for added fun I do plan to go get bloodwork done (ok, that's not so fun) and swing by Trader Joe's, and the perhaps go out to lunch.

Despite the tired, on this eve of my birthday I feel grateful for many many things, including my family, friends, and most of all, my good health. But I'll say more about all that tomorrow.

Good night, my lovelies.

post-wedding mbr

I went to a wedding, and I am TIRED!

Minimum Blog Requirement, once again.

Good night.

friday mbr

I am beyond tired tonight, just in time for the cats to start their midnight crazies. Regardless, I bid you good night. If you need me, contact Clementine and Luna. They'll be up for a while.

Good night.

toothy thursday

I am very tired tonight. Here's some things I did today, apparently some of these activities were quite exhausting!

- Went to the endodontist for a root canal. I'm not sure what I was smoking when I made this appointment. The tooth that had to be done is lucky number 13 -- top left, three away from the last molar. Getting that tooth root canaled involved being put into the dental chair with my feet higher than my head. Very strange position, and not one I should've been in right now. The good part is that the endodontist is super fast and the whole thing was over in under 45 minutes.

- Stopped by my house for a few things I need. Yes, I'm still not able to stay on my own. I miss my cozy little house. I hope I can go back there after next week's follow up appointment. I'll also have to figure out a way to sleep. I may need to buy a recliner. Hmmm...

- Went to Starbucks for a venti Christmas blend. While there I sneezed for the first time since surgery, and OH MY GOD was that painful. I won't forget my Zyrtec again. Not fun.

- Did a little clothes shopping. I found some much-needed items that were super bargains, but this is when the exhaustion set in. After I shopped for myself I needed to stop at Petsmart. I walked around there hunched over my shopping cart, I'll admit. Ugh.

- Returned to Casa de LesleyParents. Took a big nap. Ate a few bites of lunch, but didn't feel like eating anything so I eventually settled for a protein shake. Snoozed a little more.

- Got dressed and went to a demo party that one of my friends was having at a shop near the gym. Right now my wardrobe options are either Adidas pants or a skirt, so I went with the skirt, along with a very cute top I bought on Black Friday. I was smokin' hot, if I do say so myself. Since I was so close to the gym, I ducked in to say hello to my 6pm Zumba friends. I miss the hell out of my Zumba friends, however, dancing is still one of the last things on my mind right now. It really was great to see everyone, though. People have been so supportive and kind, and are all so happy for me now. I'm just floored by it, actually.

- Went back to the demo party and this is when the bigtime exhaustion set in. I decided to leave, swung by CVS for a few essentials, then went home.


All in all, a lot of activity for my recovering self. One of my former drain sites (the same one that decided to push the drain out on its own) is now leaking quite a bit. LesleyMom helped me bandage it up, and now I think tomorrow I'll stay the hell home and rest so hopefully the leak will stop!

I know I've said it before but this recovery is no joke. And kinda gross, too. I'm just saying.