Sunday, December 02, 2012

if i had some more time to spend, then i guess i'd be with you my friend...

Busy weekend, people! I feel like I usually need one day per week when I don't have to be up and out of the house at any particular time and I didn't get that and I have to say, I miss it! I used to use that time to sleep late, but ever since my sleep apnea has been cured, I can't sleep late anymore. I'm usually up by 7:30, and if I'm not out of bed by 8:00 you should come take my temperature or something. I just like having some time to chill and sip my coffee and not have to be anywhere. Ah, but there's always next weekend...

I was going to say that this weekend was the last weekend in my 30s, but then I thought that would imply that next weekend is the first weekend in my 40s, and that isn't true. I'll just be "40," I won't be "in my 40's." Important distinction, that. It's my life. Don't you forget. Caught in the crowd. It never ends.

This weekend I realized that I was more than a little tired of the whole overachiever-mommy thing with the Elf on a Shelf, and I pretty much wanted to punch everyone in the throat who posted stupid elf pictures on Facebook.  But then the damnedest thing happened...

AN ELF CAME TO LIVE WITH ME!

I have no idea why he's here. Surely, Santa did not need to send a spy from the North Pole as everyone knows that I am on the Nice List. But here he is.

He showed up in my shower on Saturday. The little Peeping Tom elf was trying catch a glimpse of yours truly in the altogether. Little pervert.

Oh but wait, there's more!


I told the Elf to make himself at home, but I was not expecting this. As you can see, he's mixing beer and liquor so presumably, there will be some elf puke in my house tomorrow morning. Lovely.

And thus we have begun 31 Days of Elf Madness! I have an idea of some of the antics that might be involved, but you really never know what might happen. It's MADNESS, I tell you!!! Oh and no, this doesn't make me as bad as the overachiever mommy types with their shelf elf cutesyness. The Lesleygirl doesn't do cutesy. It's not in my nature. When I told LesleyMom about this, she wondered what my sisters and I would have done had there been an elf on our shelf many moons ago. I said we would've thrown him in the fireplace in order to both get rid of him and dispose of the evidence, and then later I realized that there were quite a few years when we had no fireplace to throw him in. Curse you, William Levitt and your no-fireplace-having Levittown!

But I digress. Keep tuning in to see what further (mis)adventures the Elf gets into! Same Lesley time, same Lesley channel!

Ahem.

I got a much-needed haircut this weekend. I've been growing out my hair but it needed a little clean-up. The girl who cuts my hair is very fun to talk to and she loves to give me helpful advice and pep talks. One of this week's gems was that she thinks it's great that I'm so dedicated to hitting the gym because now that I've had abdominoplasty if I gain any weight I'll "gain it funny." Sound advice, that. I'm not sure if the "gain it funny" part is true, but I don't plan to find out. The pep talk portion of the haircut was hilarious, though, because it involved phrases like "the only one who knows is you, and you know what you know" followed by a very serious nod. Again, sound advice, although it did make me wonder if she'd taken some cues from LesleyMom before I got there.

Oh and I almost forgot but the subject line came about because I was in a George Harrison sort of mood earlier. But if you knew not only who sang that song but also who wrote it, then you may be the coolest person I've talked to all week. Double secret bonus points if you know which album it was on.

Some day I may give out actual prizes for knowing my music references, but for now it's just not in the budget for this blog. I suppose I could give away prizes that don't cost me anything like a hug, or a haiku, or something I knitted, though.

Good night, my saucy wee kittens. Please enjoy the remaining days of Lesleymas Advent, and get your Lesleymas shopping done very soon!

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