Wednesday, June 11, 2014

wordy wednesday

Yup, nothing wordless today, people. Although I do have a picture for yas! Yay!

1. This was tonight's dinnuh -- seared scallops with zucchini noodles, or "zoodles" if you will. I was very skeptical about the zoodles, but now I love them. When I want comfort food, I usually want pasta, and these are a surprisingly good substitute. I bought some zucchini at the farmers market, I whipped out my new julienne peeler, and voila, zoodles! I sautéed them with butter, garlic, and cheese. You should try them. Or hey, if you want, drop by Chez Lesleygirl and we can eat them together!

2. The reason for the zoodling? Oh yeah, that. Well, I haven't talked about it in a long, long time, but you longtime readers know that I have an Exotic Ovary Disease and part of that disorder is an overabundance of insulin. It's been well-controlled through nutrition, exercise, and the re-routing of my innards, but lately I was getting insulin spikes for reasons I can't discern, and the endocrinologist advised me to cut my carbs back. Yet again! Even further. What the hell, man? So previously I'd allow myself a small serving of pasta periodically, but now I'm avoiding that. And you know, I feel pretty good eating fewer carbs. Zoodles for the win! And for you inquiring minds who want to know, I used to limit myself to 100 grams of carbohydrates per day (which most people blow away in just one meal), but now I'm aiming for 40 grams, and not going above 60.

3. I've been feeling flooded the last few days and as a result feeling angry and hurt and betrayed and all those awful feelings. I've certainly directed some of that at the person who made me feel that way, but today I realized that I feel pretty angry with myself. Angry for not seeing through that person a lot sooner than I did. And even angrier because I saw a few bad signs pretty early on, and ignored them and trusted that he meant it when he said he wanted a future with me. I started re-reading old emails (since of course, I never delete anything) and after reading just a couple I had to stop. I don't know what kind of crazy I was dealing with but it was all sorts o' fucked up. One day he's half-joking around that he wonders if his former father-in-law will get him a deal on an engagement ring for me. Then the next week telling me I'm jumping to conclusions about his intentions because I'm so controlling and presumptuous. Then within a few days he's talking about buying a house together and which church we should be married in. Seriously. No wonder I couldn't tell which way was up. So I'm doing my Lesley bestest to stop being angry with myself and just forgive myself. And also to be thankful that it didn't go on longer than it did. Oh and interesting fact: if not for this blog, it could very well have gone on longer. True story. So thank you, dear readers, for giving me a reason to blog as it apparently saved me at least some heartache. Seriously.

4. Remember how yesterday I speculated that perhaps my Uncle Donnie had nudged the LesleyMom to go to Wegman's so I would see her? Well, LesleyMom herself said she thinks this was actually the work of St. Therese Lisieux, the Little Flower. Normally, St. Therese is said to send a rose, but I guess this time she sent my Mamala. So there you go.

5. I'm still having sinus issues, so today I was told that I need to go get a CAT scan of my noggin. Fun! I kinda feel like Sheldon in that episode of the Big Bang Theory when he wants to get a scan so he can have a picture of his brain. So I think I may ask them for a copy of my scan, suitable for framing. I'm not really sure what's involved in getting a CAT scan, but I'm guessing it'll be much easier on me than the MRI's I had to get when I started getting migraines. MRI's suck in general -- being stuck in a tiny tube with all these weird noises going on -- but the head MRI adds a whole new level of the suck. They put a robot-looking helmet thingy on you, then shove you in the tube. Yeah, just in case I wasn't already feeling claustrophobic. If I needed another MRI I think I'd ask them if I could do a couple shots first. Hey, don't judge. You'd do the same.

6. After work today I went to the little tiny farmers market in my little tiny fair city. I'd never gone to this market before, since usually I go to the gym on Wednesdays, but it was highly recommended so I checked it out. I got some really nice handmade soaps (one is lavender, another is mint and something else that smelled heavenly), lamb sausage from an organic farm, fresh ricotta, zucchini, and eggplant. Pretty good fare, I'd say.

Wow, six things tonight. I guess I had a lot to say.

Good night, my dear ones. And peace out, girl scouts!

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